Featured Bleeding Me Wiki: Parent Page Bleeding Me is a show based around the life of Lana Radley, a disgraced former police officer turned private investigator. When she's hired to do security for SH5 drummer Rolf Asgaard, Lana's life is changed.
Pilot Episode: Bedhopping in medias res ...(fade to blackout). 18 Months Later... Lana walks up the steps and sees that there is no doorbell. Just a huge cast iron knocker on the reclaimed cathedral door. She is about to knock when the door swings wide open. The rockstar looks at her with raised
Episode 2: The Green-Eyed Monster Simon, this is Bettina. Yeah, Legally Blonde reporter; I know who you are. Click. She hangs up on him. Three days later, there is a loud pounding on the apartment door. Lana racks her 12 gauge shotgun. Whoa, Whoa. The voice on the other side of the door protests. Jax?
Episode 3: The Heart of the Matter ... is a matter of the heart, Don Luis. Kostamo is very protective of this Lana Radley. Is she a threat to us? Her connection to the affair is that the roommate hired her services as a private investigator. The blonde bimbo, Don Luis mutters. There has been no contact between
Episode 4: La Rubia What are you working on Bettina? her editor asks as she comes over to her cubicle. I’m stalled on a celebrity profile. Hey, we need to get an intern from one of those massage schools. Rub my neck while I show you. Rolf Asgaard. Who’s that? Drummer for
Episode 5: Front Sight Betty, is that you? A voice yells across the lobby of the Four Seasons. Toni!!! And they rush over to hug each other. Everyone walks up to where the two girls are now admiring her huge diamond engagement ring. Jax, good to see you again. Kostamo says with his Cheshire
Episode 6: Nickelback Well, what should I do? Lana asks Rolf, after she’s told him the whole story that night. Let me think on this. Get a good night’s sleep. I can call Bettina, if you want your room back for tonight. She nods. Thanks for listening, Rolf. Borrow your phone?
Episode 7: At Sea Sir, a few questions? Bettina holds out her microphone to Raul, as he walks toward his car from the club. He ignores her. Please? She says forlornly, as he walks past her and her cameraman. He stops and turns around, and comes back to her. I remember you. Lana’s
Episode 8: False Flag The brothers drive in silence. So Kostamo wins this round, Ramon says. We must accept that the new order will be affirmed by The Syndicate. And afterwards, we will not be able to come against him directly without becoming an anathema to the others. So he will expect us to
Episode 9: Barefoot Dreams Club, back alley dock, mid afternoon. We’ll take another case of Absinthe. Raul reviews the purchase order, and then signs it, and the driver of the delivery truck takes off. Raul rolls up his sleeves and starts carrying the cases of spirits into the basement. When he comes back
Episode 10: Barnes & Noble Jax and Lana come into the bookstore after dinner. You cannot be serious, he tells her as he sees Raul go back behind the help desk, a pair of reading glasses on, a lanyard around his neck with his name on it. He jerks his head for Lana to look
Episode 11: Antony & Cleopatra After Jax and Rolf leave, Bettina gets up and sits next to Mike. Let me see your palm. He turns toward her so he can give her his left hand. No, no. Give me your right hand and sit comfortably. Now close your eyes so you won’t be self-conscious.
Episode 12: Meet the Parents Jaxton, let me tell you what happiness is, Lana’s father points at him, as his wife serves him a big plate of roast beef, mashed potatoes, gravy, and corn. A man was created to work six days a week. There is fulfillment in a job well done. You know
Episode 13: De Lucre Jax, I took you to my parents because I was losing control and falling too hard for you. You just cured me of that. Don’t be like that, Lana. Rolf tells her. Stay out of this, she tells him. I’m going for a run, Rolf says. Don’t
Episode 14: Marche Slav Simon, this is Lana. Quero Taco Bell. She laughs. Simon, will you be my date on Saturday? Where are we going? Symphony with Jax and Bettina, and Rolf and his date. Rolf’s bringing a date? I’ve got to meet her. Are we dressing up? You can wear whatever,
Episode 15: Under Siege Mike picks up Jon and Sam at the private portion of the airport that night. Jon, I don’t know how to express my gratitude, Mike tells him. A case of Orange Crush would be an appropriate gesture, Jon tells him. Thanks for coming, Sam. Mike tells her. She nods
Episode 16: El Gato Hello, Simon. Why are you calling? Are you willing to do a band interview before the show? Of course. Where? Jax wants to sell his place, so let’s do it here. A walk through? Yeah. Alright. What else? Mike wants to show off Sam, his new executive assistant. How
Episode 17: Back to School SH5 Fan Boards The mainstream media won’t play the interview Bettina did with the band. Too hot for them to touch.–Simon. Channel Five news gets a blizzard of angry emails and requests for the footage. They put it on their website. And the news that the band is
Episode 18: Drum Fills “Just don’t burn the place down” is posted on the band’s website, along with date and time. New material only. 1,000 street tickets: $80 per. Limit one per customer. They sell out in six minutes. Devoted fans caravan in from across the country. The city council holds
Episode 19: Bass Flange Hello, Sam. Rolf tells her as he gets into the passenger seat of her car. Hello, gifted one. I heard that you completely psyched out the guys. She smiles widely, and he gives her a high five. I still don’t know how you did it. The devil is wise
Episode 20: All Creatures Bettina’s church The worship team opens the service with St. Francis of Assissi’s All Creatures of Our God and King, and everyone gradually stands, following Lana and Bettina’s lead. There’s a commotion behind them as Simon steps over several pews to land next to Lana. She
Episode 21: Parabol+Parabola Several FBI agents linger around the breakroom and devour the carrot cupcakes that Toni has brought in. Conference in five, their supervisor tells them, and grabs one. How many have you had? He asks one of his subordinates. I lost count, the man admits, they’re worse than Pringles. Toni,
Episode 22: Luchador Kostamo hears singing and a guitar playing through the open upstairs window as he walks toward the apartment building. Fifteen seconds later he knocks on the door. The guitar stops. Who is it? Bettina asks. Kostamo. He hears voices talking, and Lana opens the door, and peeks out. Are you
Episode 23: Bleak House MTV Breaking News Jaxton Ayers, bass player for Slaughterhouse Five, is an a coma at St. Catherine’s in New Orleans after being assaulted at an abandoned drive-in movie theater. His girlfriend, Lana Radley, the notorious former NOPD police officer, is the chief suspect and a massive manhunt is underway.
Episode 24: Triage The next day, Toni leaves early for work, and Bettina sleeps in. Then goes about cleaning the apartment and cooking. At eleven am, the drizzle stops and the sun comes out. She changes into a workout outfit, putting an unzipped hoodie jacket over her Channel 5 Tshirt and heads outside